Children should have a choice in seeing their grandparents, Milanese court rules

Rome- The Court of Cassation has ruled that grandchildren should not be forced to see their grandparents, especially children who are capable of ‘discernment’ or who are older than 12.

 The ruling comes after a particularly intense and complicated case concerning a family where the relationship between the parents of the children and the grandparents was deeply strained, and where the paternal grandparents had appealed to the court for visiting rights to see their grandchildren.

 Here the judge said that it was their responsibility not to impose (un)wanted relationships on the children but rather to rule in a way that would be in the best interest of the children.

 Initially it was ruled that the grandchildren should see their paternal grandparents and uncle in the presence of a social worker, and that the relationship should continue after the grandmother proved she was consulting a psychiatrist. However, the ruling was quickly overturned after the grandmother continued to exhibit aggressive behavior towards the parents of the grandchildren, and according to her psychiatrist “was unaware of her own condition of mental distress”.

 Rather according to the Milanese magistrates :"it was necessary to raise awareness in parents of the psychic damage to which their children are exposed, forced to live deprived of the affections that could enrich them, could induce a climate of fear and resentment". 

 The Court of Appeal ruled that the family should seek extended family therapy and instructed social services to supervise the meetings between the grandchildren and grandparents and write reports on the situation. Further ruling that "there was no real prejudice for the children in spending time with their grandparents and uncle", who had been described by the consultants as "sincerely attached to their grandchildren“, and recognized the paternal side of the family’s right to a relationship with the grandchildren. 

 This ruling was however refuted by the Court of Cassation who ruled that "the absence of a real prejudice in spending time with grandparents and uncle" is not sufficient to impose an unwanted relationship on the grandchildren. Further stating that: “to take an active part fruitfully in the life of the grandchildren through the construction of a relational and emotional relationship and in such a way as to favor the healthy and balanced development of their personality." According to the Court of Cassation the children should in no way be forced to see their grandparents or have any unwanted relationship involuntarily imposed on them, but rather should be exposed to other “tools of mediation” which may trigger a spontaneous desire to reconcile with their grandparents. Further saying that “the right of grandparents to see minor grandchildren cannot prevail over the interest of the same children who express opposition to this relationship and cannot be forced especially if we are dealing with children capable of “discernment” or who have reached the age of 12.”. 

 The case has now been put in the hands of the Court of Milan who has put it under review.

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